On a recent Saturday morning, Wally and I were driving the boys to Florida where we were to meet up with Grandpa. Grandpa was going to take the boys to my sister’s for the weekend.
Sweet 24 hour freedom!
It was a 2.5 hour drive for us one-way, plus, it was a very cold and rainy 2.5 hour drive.
I love my morning coffee as it is, but add in cold and rain, and my, oh my, I go a little overboard with it. I had a big mug before we left the house, then I filled up my bigger travel mug with hot, steamy coffee.
Needless to say, by the time we reached our destination, I had to *ahem* tinkle.
Praise the Burger King that was right across from the drop off point.
I dashed inside BK and into the bathroom to find only a two stall john. One of the stalls happened to be occupied, so I went into the other….only to notice the door jam was broken and there was no way to lock the door.
Oh well, I thought, what are the chances someone will not check under the door for feet. Really, who doesn’t check for feet if the door is closed? I certainly do! And you know whatever the Queen of Shake Shake does, all people with good sense do too.
Um, yeah. You probably know where I’m going with this.
Sure enough, a woman came in, skipped the first stall, which was now empty, came to my stall and opened the door on me.
But wait. She didn’t open the door at any ol’ time.
Oh no.
She opened the stall at the VERY moment I was about to wipe. And I know you gals know what that means.
LEGS! OPEN!
That’s when she screamed.
Oh. Yes. She. Did. She screamed at the sight of my hoo-haa.
See, I told you I don’t shave in the wintertime.
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Um, I hope that sample photo wasn’t (no teeth in there, right?)
That is some funny stuff right there!!!! Thanks for the giggle!
You made me gigglesnort. The picture just sent me over the edge.
Thanks for the great laugh! I really needed it today!
OhMahGah! One of my worst nightmares!
(walking in on your hoo-haw AND being walked in on myself).
The photo really was the clincher.
What?! She didn’t check for feet under the door first? Everyone knows THAT rule…
So funny! And really, what woman doesn’t check for feet first? Plus, if you were just about to wipe, there had to have been some noise from the toilet paper. Open your ears, woman!
She screamed? Ha ha ha!
I can not believe you posted a picture of your hoo-haa on your blog. You dirty girl.
Oh my Gah! Whenever I’m in a stall like that, I prop my foot against the door. It’s a little awkward, but probably not as awkward as having my hoo-haa screamed at.
It’s sensitive. It might not take the rejection well.
(And thanks for the sweet comment on my blog. That coming from you means the world to me. You’re my funny idol!)
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
Being the mom of two small boy children, I’m sure you’ve mastered the “hover” which generally has your hoo-haa facing the back of the stall, and the wipe, where you pull your shirt bottom out and down over your thighs to shield the lightning fast manuver of the other hand executing the clean sweep? Didn’t think you needed this technique when alone? Thought you could relax and piss in peace? We can always hope…
And the picture at the end…Classic.
I am sure my hoo-haa makes people scream, too!
Oh lord that is hilarious.
my hoo-haa makes my husband scream…if that makes you feel better…
That story, along with the picture, will have my laughing all morning. Thanks for sharing.
OMG!! Let’s call them “Wookies” from now on!!
She screamed!? Was she by any chance wearing a habit and some rosaries?
“Wookies” snort, snort.
You had me at the title.
Hooooooooooo! That was excellent!
just spit coffee all over my screen.
Not only can’t I believe she didn’t check for feet (seriously), but she screamed? Dude.
I probably would have screamed if I saw Chewbacca instead of a hoo ha,too.
Good thing it wasn’t Han Solo or she probably would have made inappropriate advances toward you.
(You know, because it would be HAN SOLO after all.)
Dude, I love how classy you are!
*still laughing…*
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
That is classic! LM*O… Diet Pepsi came out of my nose btw!
Is she bare as a babie’s butt? Why the hell would she scream?
Okay, so it is umm several months after this post that I am finding my way here, but wow! What a memorable first blog post read!
I am in utter hysterics! And when I didn’t think I could laugh any harder I see the Wookie – Chubaka the Hoo-Haa Wookie.
Love it!
LMFAO…what a great story!! Thanks for the giggle!
Bwahaha! *gigglesnort* indeed.
Too funny!
I’m continuing to spread the 704 lurve.