Just so you people know, my kids leave this afternoon with my mom to visit their aunt and cousins for the weekend.

That leaves me and Wally here at home CHILDLESS!

Did you get that last part? The part about being CHILDLESS? It’s in all caps and followed by a ! because it’s that important. Be sure to note everything in all caps because those words are important too. In fact, this entire blog is important as I am important, so pay attention.

To add a cherry to the top of this already scrumptious sundae of life, this will be my SECOND weekend in a row without the kids. That is a first in my 8 year motherhood history.

But the best first of firsts is that this weekend will be THE FIRST in our short history of CHILDLESS weekends where I will NOT be on the rag.

I don’t know what gods of fate are sitting up somewhere high and having a good laugh at mine and Wally’s expense, but I shit you not when I say that every time we have had a CHILDLESS weekend (all 4 of them), I have been on the rag every! damn! time! And I wasn’t just on the rag, but day one and day two of Aunt Flo’s visit. For all women and anyone who has lived with a woman and had sex with her, that needs no further explanation.

Also, it’s our wedding ANNIVERSARY this weekend. Twelve years, thank you very much.

That special date could make me a bit biased against BlogHer, and my sudden recovery from BlogHer envy I admit is suspicious. How do we know if my return from jealousy is sincere and legit? Let’s be fair and objective and compare Break Out Sessions of BlogHer ‘08 to ShagHer ‘08.

BlogHer Break Out Session
Who We Are: Introversion, Blogging, and BlogHer
What We Do: Taking Care of Business
What We Believe: Tools for Online Fundraising and Activism
How We Communicate: Building Traffic via Content and Community
Mommyblogging: Is Mommyblogging Still a Radical Act?
Blogging Birds of a Feather: Home/Garden & Crafts/DIY
Room of Your Own: Talking About War & Peace/Who Better Serves Women Like You: Obama or McCain

ShagHer Break Out Session
Who We Are: Perversion, Snogging and ShagHer
What We Do: Taking Care of Bidness: Hot Monkey Sex Bidness, that is.
What We Believe: Sex Tools Are For Fun
How We Communicate: Was It Good For You Too?
Mommyblogging: Is Sex in the Kitchen Still a Radical Act?
Blogging Turds Named Heather: Sex/Shag & Shag/Sex
Room of Your Own: Talking About Sex & Shagging/Who Better Serves Women Like Me: Wally or Wally

And that’s all before lunch.

San Franwherever.

I’m at ShagHer ‘08, bitches.

This entry was posted on Friday, July 18th, 2008 at 3:01 am and is filed under Marital Bon Mot. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.